It was a Saturday night, and I was sitting at a trendy, modern Mexican restaurant. White walls, white tables, white chairs, and beautiful lighting fixtures and candles. I had a mango margarita and four beautiful tiny tacos, followed by chicken enchiladas with mole sauce.
I’d had a stressful week and was even working that weekend. To be good to myself in the little time I had alone and without work, I’d decided to take myself out to dinner.
When I got to dinner, I found that I was starving. I plowed through three small tacos, and two and a half gourmet enchiladas. Like the intuitive eater that I am, I kept asking myself “am I still hungry?” but the answer always seemed to be “YES.”
When I finished my meal – I ate nearly everything – the waitress looked at me with a knowing smile. “A bit too much, eh?” This is one of those modernist New York Mexican restaurants, filled with rail-thin women with straight hair sipping trendy beverages. It’s probably not every day that a woman comes into this modern, hip restaurant and orders two appetizers and one entrée and eats almost all of them herself.
A little flustered, I said to her, “Oh, no, it was perfect. I was so hungry.”
As I walked home, I reminded myself that it’s okay it’s okay for people to make assumptions about who I am and what I need.
It’s also okay for them to be wrong.
Do you know that feeling? That moment, when someone else makes an assumption about what you should want or should be in the world?
Suddenly, even if you didn't doubt your decision before, you feel...wobbly. A little insecure.
I just wanted to give you a reminder this week: It's hard to stand in your truth in the world. It's inevitable that other people will make assumptions about who you are and what you need.
But, of course, other people will also be wrong.
And if you ever feel strange or weird or uncertain, you can always think of me, sitting alone at a trendy Mexican restaurant, enjoying my unfashionably large meal.
I’m rooting for you :)