Some of my longer-term readers already know, but I gave birth to twin boys in June of 2020. As I write this, my babies are already nine months old!
From this standpoint, I feel comfortable admitting something that always made me a little embarrassed:
I was a little nervous about eating during pregnancy + postpartum.
In retrospect, I think it was because, over the years, I’ve read a fair number of celebrity interviews about their pregnancy and postpartum experiences.
Have you ever read those? Celebrities — at least in articles I’ve read — seem to talk about eating huge quantities of food, gorging on Krispy Kremes…and then gaining tons of weight. And then afterwards: going on incredibly restrictive diets + doing mind-bogglingly intense workouts.
None of that sounded appealing to me.
Not the crazy cravings + enormous portions; that doesn’t sound like it would make you feel well! And definitely not the strict dieting + exercise; I definitely wasn’t going to do that.
So today, I wanted to share what helped me during my twin pregnancy + post-partum period, and why I think it was so useful.
Here it is:
I figured out how to eat in a way that served me before I ever got pregnant.
“Eating in a way that serves you” means eating in a way that furthers your health as a whole person: your physical health, emotional health, mental health, and spiritual health — and more.
On one hand, this might be disappointing. It’s not some dramatic “Experts Hate This Los Angeles Mom For Her Fat Loss Secret.” It’s not new or different from what I suggest for non-pregnant folks, what I write about on this blog, and what I teach — in practical steps — in the Dessert Club Mastermind.
On the other hand, I cannot overemphasize how grateful I was to have this methodology for eating, for four reasons:
1. Pregnancy wasn’t the only time I could enjoy indulgent food
Have you ever read any celebrity interviews about pregnancy? In the articles I’ve read, they’re always talking about all of the junk food they ate — Krispy Kremes, pizza, multiple containers of mac and cheese in one sitting.
(I considered linking to some of these articles. But honestly, I find them stressful — with lots of talk of dieting, guilt, “pigging out,” and more.)
Many of these same celebrities also bemoan the particularly large amount of weight that they gained. I’m not here to shame anyone for their weight gain — pregnancy or otherwise! But I have wondered: do they view pregnancy as their only chance to eat enjoyable food? As a result, do they eat more indulgent food than really serves them?
The truth is, I already ate plenty of delicious, indulgent food before I was pregnancy; I’d been eating that way for the past decade. I felt comfortable around those foods — confident that I could enjoy them in quantities that felt satisfying, and also feel well in my body.
Plus — and this might even be more important — I knew that I’d be continuing to eat delicious, indulgent food after my pregnancy.
So during my pregnancy…I just ate like I always ate. I didn’t particularly feel like I “overindulged” — I just ate like normal.
2. I was already respecting my hunger signals.
Many of the same celebrities who bemoan eating lots of indulgent food also bemoan how much they ate during pregnancy. They often complain about how much weight they gained during pregnancy as a result of all of that eating.
I suspect that at least part of that weight gain may be because they were underweight to begin with — Hollywood beauty standards prize a level of thinness that is not necessarily healthy.
But, I also wonder if at least part of it is that many of them have spent years or decades being slightly hungry all the time. So during pregnancy — when it is clear that under-eating will be unhealthy for your baby – they want to eat, and they want to finally be full…really full.
I already respected my hunger signals — meaning, I ate to fullness every day for more than a decade. So, again, pregnancy wasn’t my only time to be full.
3. I was already eating based on my (variable) experience of hunger, rather than fixed ideas about portion size.
My experience of eating during pregnancy and postpartum is that there has been a lot of variation in my hunger levels. Some of that was obvious and expected — feeling queasy and not very hungry in the first trimester, for example.
But I didn’t, personally, realize how much variation there would be in general. Some days, I felt like I was hungry for 1.5x or 2x what I might eat for dinner on another day. Some days — even now, while I’m still breastfeeding my boys — I need two snacks between breakfast and lunch. Other days I don’t.
My experience of working with clients and myself is that if you eat based on preconceived, mental ideas of portion sizes, you tend to have two modes: “on” (when you eat an “appropriate” portion) and “off” (when you eat the entire bag of chips). So if you are extra hungry during pregnancy or postpartum, you might just enter “off” mode — and keep eating and eating.
One of the core beliefs about eating is that you should listen to your body’s experience, not the clock, and not your preconceived ideas about what you should eat. I was used to eating in a nuanced way that varied by the day and by the meal — and I think that really helped me eat an amount that was right for me, given the enormous amount of variation during this time.
4. I could tell when I was eating based on true needs, versus based on stress, emotions, or fatigue.
This was particularly crucial for postpartum eating. It’s probably not shocking to admit: especially in the early days my babies were born, I was emotional, stressed and exhausted…a fair amount.
It’s also probably not shocking to point out: It is very, very easy to eat in a way that doesn’t serve you when you are stressed, emotional, or exhausted.
For many of us, it will require skills that we may not currently have to notice when we are eating in response to things like stress, emotions, or fatigue, and then to intervene in a way that is gentle, realistic, and that doesn’t set off a chain reaction of more and more unhappy eating.
It’s not a bad idea to start practicing this before you have a screaming 21-day-old who won’t sleep.
…
Of course, emphasizing that I listened to myself and my body doesn’t mean that I also didn’t listen to experts. This book was very helpful for my twin pregnancy, for example, and I did try to prioritize protein, iron, and keeping my blood sugar levels stable, in a way that felt gentle and kind to myself.
And I also want to say: even if you are already pregnant — or the “babies” are out and eighteen years old — I don’t think it’s too late! The kinds of eating ideas that I talk about here will serve you no matter when you start.
I’ll say it again: It’s not too late.
It’s never too late to start eating authentically, in a way that truly serves you.
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